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Just cnt take it anymore

3 Replies Last post by the fixer 8 months ago

helpmeplz >> 09/09/2012 9:30pm

My whole world is caving in i cant do anything right and i just cant take it anymore

Replies:

the fixer >> 24/09/2012 1:42am

Hi helpmeplz,,,,,,whats wrong ?

30019 >> 16/09/2012 1:14am

Have had diagnosed depression for three years. Keep slipping into major depression am so tired of it. Feel like I'm never going to get better :(

LonelyGirl34712 >> 12/09/2012 3:51pm

Its okay to feel pressured, but you need to talk to someone.

I don't know what's hapening

2 Replies Last post by emily-caldwell@hotmail.com 8 months ago

Always >> 08/09/2012 6:49pm

I am 14 years old and just recently found out I had depression. I don't know what has caused it and when I got it. Last year it was quite a hard year. And this year I started to feel real alone and everything changed, my appetite, emotions and irritably. I really want to know what brought on my depression..

Replies:

emily-caldwell@hotmail.com >> 22/09/2012 7:56pm

How about going to a therapist as they should know maybe what triggered it ?

ForeverAlone >> 10/09/2012 6:04pm

Sometimes it can be the smallest things. A rude comment or a negative thought can send your head spiralling out of control. Just need to talk to someone and you'll get through it :)

Feeling Depressed

Last post by Zain 8 months ago

Zain >> 22/09/2012 6:36pm

I am a 14 year old boy and I've been going through depression for a while now. i just hate myself so much and I feel so worthless. I am doing well at school but i feel so pathetic all the time because I do no extra-curricular activities. I'm too clumsy to join any sports team, so the only sport i do is cycling because it's the only one I'm good at. But it's not a team sport anD i don't enjoy it. I'm always judging how I look and i always worry about what other people think of me, especially my friends. i have low self esteem and i'm sick of being judged. I see my school counsellor every week, but i don't know if it is helping me. I'm not an all-rounded person, I'm only very academic. I have a lot of friends but I don't know how to earn respect. i try to be really kind to girls, but they don't ever seem to like me. I struggle to see much hope in my future. I feel like i'm never good enough for anyone. What should I do?

I am totally lost and i am falling apart and losing everything....Nobody is there who could help me...

3 Replies Last post by danitylittlered 8 months ago

Lostallhope >> 18/09/2012 10:15am

Hi all,I am just feeling i am not a human being anymore and my soul is ready to fly away because i can not take this pressure and embarrassment of being a total loser any more and i don't know how should i start...i don't have words.But i hope someone is there who could understand me.. Rejection after rejection for job which means my life to me(Very important for my existence,very very, my all relations and everything is based on it),Emotional,financial abuse of spouse,Intense pressure from family, Little child(2 year old) thousand miles away, and Limited visa (only 2 months left still could not get a job, Wherever i go people just listen to me and give me artificial sympathy but never did anything for me.I was the best student of my university,University colour,Roll of honour, college colour and national winner of Debate and histrionics contest ).I can not explain it. Iam 23 year old female, Come to NZ with a dream of golden future.But struggling here for 4 years.There is nothing which i got here,i just lost everything.I don't know what is wrong.I pray to God but seems like he has forgot me.I never did anything wrong or said a harsh word to anyone.Why me? why me? Oh! God why me???I am not even getting a one chance...why..If i could not settle here in NZ...i can not take this embarrassment...Because nobody including my in-laws-family and husband gonna treat me good way..They will take away my child and my parents are not that strong financially,They could afford me to live with them..My husband who was supposed to stand with me in this difficult time...he is the biggest discouraging person and humiliating person for me in this crisis. He does not care, in fact no one cares if i die today or tomorrow. My life is worse than dog and dust.I can not say in words no one can imagine which phases of life and hard times i am going through.After two months if i don't get a job relating to my study subjects..Immigration NZ will kick me out of NZ. .I came here in search of good future but i am losing it day by day....I can not say other things i don't have words...But i am suffocating and Life is getting worse and worse....And i have only 2 months.....(Please excuse my spelling mistake..) Bless you all and may God help you and me....

Replies:

danitylittlered >> 22/09/2012 1:55pm

stay strong.
x

starchild >> 20/09/2012 11:22pm

Don't try to be so hard on yourself for a start. You are young, you life has not yet even begun yet.

Joshboii >> 19/09/2012 9:43pm

You arent a loser. I feel like a loser all the time. I care. Your child cares. You have to be strong for your child. Please keep trying i believe in you.

I feel everyone all of a sudden everyone hates me, and doesnt want to be around me

4 Replies Last post by lewanna_ 8 months ago

ash3 >> 16/12/2010 9:04pm

I feel like my friends are against me, talk about me behind my back, never want to be around me, it makes me very quiet and unhappy, which in turn nobody likes being around unhappy people anyway!

Replies:

lewanna_ >> 22/09/2012 6:46am

i know how you feel, thats how i feel right now! and the same crisis im going through

Angelique P >> 25/12/2010 9:31pm

I posted a topic about how i was bullied and still is getting bullied this year and it all started with a girl i trusted so much then one day she turned on me to 'fit' in with the so called 'in' group. i had one friend and he was a guy as well that kept me sane...only 1.. while my WHOLE year hated me. He helped me so much... just find one person hun and if you cant just vent and let it out on here ,we can all relate. best of luck xx

Lost.And.Confused >> 21/12/2010 9:17pm

i know how you feel it is hard i feel the same as you it makes me feel judges and confused and guilty and sad but i dont know what i have done wrong sad face

weary >> 17/12/2010 5:08pm

i know exactly how you feel and i hate it. like your best friends dont even want to be around me anymore? but i have one friend that is always there and i think there will be one friend there for you too. and thats all you need, one person who will always be there to help you. x

Depressed Single Mumma

1 Reply Last post by lippylongstockings 8 months ago

onlytobe >> 14/09/2012 8:36am

I am a single mum of 1 and a full time student I have been dealing with depression since 13 and now I am 25 - I feel like with everything going on around me at the moment I am lost in the sea of life - i can't take it anymore and I am so sick of being strong or pretending to be strong - I get home and lay in bed a cry for hours! Its hard to get up in the morning and I find myself getting worse and worse - i cam off my medications by myself because they weren't working for me! I know this was a stupid move but 12 years on the same drug and it had lost its effect! I need friends who understand!

Replies:

lippylongstockings >> 21/09/2012 5:16pm

Hi onlytobe
I have just read your post, and I want you to know it resonates with me so deeply, I can relate so much to your situation. I too am a single mother and have battled with depression since my teens, and I too have also tried to juggle study with motherhood and life in general. Its a hard place to be, and can be so overwhelming and lonely, its no wonder we find solace and comfort in escaping to our beds! It used to be my primary coping mechanism, and I would often spend days there, not because I was lazy, but because it was my only place of escape. Those who have not experienced these feelings before find it really hard to relate, and though well meaning, they dont comprehend how hard it can be to actually physically get up out of bed, to face the world for yet another day. So then add to that feelings of guilt and failure to operate as 'normal', especially when you are a mother in high demand! It has taken me many years of falling in and out of the same cycles to learn how best to deal with my low points, and how to take notice of what I call my 'triggers' so that I have time to take proactive steps before I get so low Im debilitated. Personally, I found that medication is not ideal, I feel that by taking a pill alone your are not truly dealing with the issues that got you there in the first place, and I don't like the way meds make me feel 'numb' and 'personalityless'. However, in saying that there have been times that I have been so dangerously low that medication has been vital in order to get me to a stage where I can cope. I have found that counselling has helped immensely, and that small changes to my lifestyle, a little at a time, have been beneficial as well. I dont know how open you are to the spiritual side of things, but for me, being open to this allows myself to learn more about myself, and therefore the purpose of my being. Sound wishy washy I know, but it works for me.
I can see that I am beginning to ramble now, there is so much more I could say, I feel so strongly about it all. If it helps, there are 3 things I want to share with you
1) You are a very important being in this world, and perhaps the most important being in your childs life, so treat yourself as such. Someone with such responsibility as the care and well being of another certainly deserves and requires much care and love herself, in order to operate at the best of her capabilities.
2) Despite your responsibilities, you are still human, and all humans fail sometimes. This is how we learn. So, when you have a bad day/week/ whatever, dont be too critical of yourself. And dont feel that you always have to be strong either!! Admitting that sometimes things get the better of you takes more strength than most would like to admit, as it requires the guts to admit we are not perfect. Life is for learning and by the end of your journey, if you give yourself the chance, you'll be very well educated :-)
3) This is a little something I do in the mornings when Im struggling to get up. I think of one thing I can look forward to in the day, and one thing I am grateful for in the day. It doesnt have to be big, it can be as simple as having had a safe place to sleep that night, and a coffee to enjoy in the sun with 5 minutes to myself after my daughter is dropped at school. Small, simple things that we are able to enjoy where so many cannot. It puts things into a better perspective for me, it allows me to see that though things are bad, there are many who have it worse.
Anyway, maybe this has helped, but at the very least, know that someone else out there understands!!
much love
Lippy

Why does it happen to us?

Last post by Upto. 8 months ago

Upto. >> 18/09/2012 7:55pm

Why does everything happen to me? i do nothing wrong to the girls and all they do it want to pick on me and make me feel miserbale! I don't understand why? It is so hard for me to concentrate in school, think that i have friends everything! and everyday is just getting harder - i think that we should make a page and show them that we are strong and that they are the ones with the problem!

Upto.

Me and my story

3 Replies Last post by Greenie.Girl 8 months ago

bman >> 17/08/2012 10:41pm

Hello all.
I felt i needed to tell others how i feel about myself and what i'm going through.
I'm a 22 year old male, and sometimes i do not have much confidence in myself, even ashamed because i always try to be a person to others that i am not to impress my friends, and above all, Girls.
The reality is what i'm sure many others go through; i'm lonely, at the moment my life is over burdened with more cons than pros.
Most of these problems are i could say are temporary, and thankfully will haunt me for not much longer, as i start my new career which i know will change me forever as a person.
But even so, i am racked with so much guilt, and feel these problems will never be sorted.
One problem that won't leave me is my dad; He left me when i was 12. At the time i was a little sad, but being young, i didn't feel much.
After the first few years at high school did i start to realize what i had lost. I now haven't seen him in about 9 years, with him making no effort to contact his son in any way.
Over time, and as i have gotten older he has sort of become a distant memory, and i feel like i have never had a dad in the first place. Is it right to shut him out completely?
Last year i was in a car crash, with carelessness on my part. I put a man in hospital, and over 4 months i was in and out of court.
Because of my career, i wasn't convicted, but was left with large reparation, and disqualification.
Every time i pay a bit of money, i feel like the the day when that sum gets to $0 just keeps getting further away from me, sort of like i will never get there.
I will admit that although i don't drink often, on the weekends, permitting i have money, i go all out, and get absolutely wasted. I make promises to quit drinking, but that doesn't work. The next day i get wracked with guilt that i can't even keep my own promises or goals.
I have gotten a lot better though, which i am really happy about.
As for myself, i feel that there's not much there as a man.
My friends all have girlfriends, and i often wonder what i am missing.
I had a girlfriend nearly 5 years ago, but apparently she cheated on me so that's that.
I do have a few friends who are girls, and putting it simply, they are some of the best mates anyone could ask for.
At parties, my friends with all the confidence in the world will find girls to talk to, and usually go off with them, while i'l stick with people i know, and be the low man on the totem pole. I am a very shy person with not much courage in meeting new people, especially girls.
However that changes once I've had enough to drink, which i hate about myself.
Anyway, that's all i can think of at the time to say, and i know it's a lot to read, so hope people can stick around to read it all, and maybe give pointers or advice.
Thanks :)

Replies:

Grateful :) >> 19/08/2012 10:31pm

Hi bman,Thanks for sharing your story There’s a lot in here, so I’m just going to pick out certain things and reply. Just telling you because it’ll probably sound quite disjointed :PSelf-confidence can be very difficult to build. I find though that the best way to generate self-esteem is by doing esteemable acts.Loneliness is something I struggle with too. When I’m feeling lonely or feeling like I wish I had a significant other, I make a mental list of all the people in my life who care about me, and it helps. You should try it It won’t fix every lonely day, but it should hopefully work for some of them.That sucks that your dad bailed like that. Since no one else is going to fully understand your perspective as a result of not having all your first-hand experiences, I don’t think any of us can tell you what the right approach is with regards to the nature of your relationship with your father. That’ll be up to you. If it is upsetting you though, it’s probably worth sitting down and assessing, or talking about. I find that talking through a problem with someone else, even if I’m not looking for their advice, is a good way of sorting it out in my mind and making sense of the situation.Ya, getting wasted to change your personality is probably not the best. If you’re having a lot of trouble with quitting drinking, there are options. We can talk about them if it becomes a persistent problem. My sister is an addict, and one of my best friends struggles with social anxiety and alcoholism, so I’ve got some experience with it. Sometimes it’s not that you’re weak, it’s just that the substance is too strong, and you need other people’s help.It’s good that you can recognize when you’re doing better Best of luck! I’ll check back later to see if you reply.Grateful :)

N. >> 19/08/2012 10:14pm

Hi :)
I just thought I would reply to you because when I read your post it reminded me of a friend of mine. I know I can't fix things for you but who knows maybe I can say something that will help?

Sometime life deals you a bad set of cards and its easy to dwell on all the things in your life that you wish were different. It's easy to wonder what your life might be like if you had better parents, or the perfect job or the perfect girlfriend. It's alot harder to see the good in things you already have especially when you've been feeling down. When I'm feeling down I try and think about the people who care about me, I think about the things that I do like about myself, I text a friend just so I can get a txt back and remind myself that people do like me.

If your not happy with your job or you want to meet a girl by all means get out there. But just remember that your happiness doesn't have to depend on that, because your a good person, and your going to be okay.

Greenie.Girl >> 18/09/2012 6:07pm

Hi I thought I'd reply to your story because I can really relate to parts of it. I'm 21 & like you always try & be someone I'm not so that others will like me. I'm pretty shy when sober & find it hard to interact with others, but love drinking at the weekends because it gives me heaps of confidence I wouldn't usually have, so I end up going all out on the booze. I have friends but even them I am not completely comfortable around, so am pretty lonely although I put on a brave face around others. Like you I am hoping this rut will end soon as in 6months time I will have my dream career, I'm just hoping that my shyness in meeting new people etc won't always burden me! But I guess what I want to say is that you shouldn't worry so much about trying to impress girls & being someone you're not. I thought I would never have a boyfriend because of the way I am, but recently was in a relationship of 18months, & we were became best friends as well as partners. Even though we have broken up now the point of me telling you that is that even if you think you are an awkward weirdo around girls, there is someone out there who will like you for who you are, so don't try & be someone else & don't beat yourself up about not being good with the girls like your mates. Honestly, just be patient & you will just click with someone one day. As for the rest of your story I can really relate to or offer any advice, but I'm really sorry about your
dad. :)

hi

Last post by afromuso 8 months ago

afromuso >> 18/09/2012 4:49pm

I never wanted to tell anyone how i was feeling. Its hard to recognise that there is something/s wrong in your life and when you do it seems hard to find ways of fixing the emotions. Things can become a habit or a vicious cycle. I always thought if you appear happy maybe you can convince yourself you are. But somewhere along the line you realise that faking it just doesnt cut it.

Sometimes it seems you can have lots of people around you that love you but it can be hard to find someone who really understand how your feeling. I guess i always think if i fill my time with things to do it will distract me but it always catches up. Im not sure why i feel so lonely and upset all the time but i hope i can atleast start to understand myself better.

Ive always put all the bad things about myself on the table when talking with friends almost as if to say this is who i am and im sorry. I hope i can be a better person. I always try to be happy but it seems if one little thing goes bad in my life i fall apart, wipe my tears and move on; but im not dealing with whats wrong, its not moving on. I dont know how to fix me even when i do things i think will make me or people around me happy even just for a little while atleast.

What do you do?

Why was bullied ever invented?

Last post by Upto. 8 months ago

Upto. >> 18/09/2012 3:23pm

i hate bullying so much now! i have been constantly bullied since primary school and i am in year 11 at school now. But all it has done is made my life go down hill. Its is really hard work for me everyday to get out of bed and even think of yay I'm going to school. but it is especially hard for me as i go to boarding school and have to put up with it 24 / 7. I don't see why you have the time to bully people... if you have problems like you should talk to someone not take it out on someone that is already being put through enough! I hate life now, i feel that i shouldn't be here and am not welcome! And this is not a feeling that i like at all i want it all just to stop. no one should have to put up with this. i hate all you cows who try to hurt me - i will stand my ground until i can't anymore. just leave me alone and i know that there is a few of you on here so please just leave me alone and let me have my old fun life back. Upto.

Is there hope for someone that has been on and off anti depressants for 17 years?

Last post by DMatchitt43 8 months ago

DMatchitt43 >> 15/09/2012 9:54pm

I've been on and off anti depressants for as long as I can remember. I had gotten to the stage where I thought that I could never be freed from this debilitating illness. Of late I have been feeling really lethargic and emotionlly and mentally fatigued. I lost hope in thinking that there is a solution. Is there hope?

My Story

Last post by Angus_A 8 months ago

Angus_A >> 15/09/2012 8:42am

Hey everyone
This is a life story of mine theres no real moral or anything here but i hope it will help some people or open up some discussion amongst you all about what to do with your life and fighting your depression.

When i was 14 years old i lived in Hamilton.
My parents and i did not get along and i was at an age when i was discovering things like alcohol etc.
by the time i was 15 i had run away from home.
During this time i met the love of my life, for the purposes of secrecy lets call her 'Rain'.
Due to my own selfishness and refusal to change she passed away when i was 18, apparently owing to a brain hemorrhage...she was heavily pregnant at the time.
Both my then fiance and son were gone from my life and my brain was not in great shape...

i was diagnosed with severe depression that same year and i made a promise that i would become a better man and set an example for my children one day.
i refused to take medication and i still do, i wanted to do this by myself.
i moved to wellington to get as far away from my dogs as possible and devoted all my time to learning to read and write and get a normal education.
im now training as a chef and hope to own my own restaurant some day.
i also help kids who are leaving or have been affected by gangs.

i will never be able to wipe the blood off my hands from those days past but im going to be that better man i promised to be...my depression still bites me now and then but i have learned to deal with it.
i hope somehow this helped you guys, its nice to vent once in a while.

Angus

Anxiety

1 Reply Last post by Angus_A 8 months ago

ellie0may >> 09/09/2012 8:21pm

I am only 15 years old and i had anxiety when i was a young child and my mother didn't except me for it, and now in my teens i have to deal with depression. When i moved to a new school it had just got really bad, i didn't have many friends as people tended to think i was 'weird' and 'different' i cried almost every night about everything; school, family, my mum and my ability to socialize was terrible. I'm in a complete mess and i just want to get out and see the sun again...

Replies:

Angus_A >> 15/09/2012 8:24am

Then go out, the only one stopping you is yourself.
I used to suffer from massive anxiety attacks myself you just have to use a bit of tough love on yourself :)
theres no point lying around feeling sorry for yourself just be firmer with yourself and the anxiety will soon waste away.

Nothing helps.

2 Replies Last post by Angus_A 8 months ago

Hopeless :( >> 03/09/2012 11:48pm

I have been diagnosed with both Major Depressive Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder and have been trying to manage them both for a long time. I've tried all sorts of things, including counselling and medication, but nothing seems to have lastng effects. I'm starting to believe that my medication has just been acting as a placebo, as it seemed to work at first but now is not.

As a result of my depression (or perhaps as symptoms), I often engage in binge-purging. Although I know these behaviours are unhealthy and counterproductive, I cannot seem to make myself care. Last year I was suicidal for a time, but now I'm not even that. I just feel stuck in this rut that I will never escape.

The other problem is that I don't like to talk to anyone about the extent of my symptoms. Several of my friends also suffer from depression (as well as eating disorders), and as much as they can relate to how I feel, I find that I do not like to disclose the full extent of what I'm going through. I find myself drawing further and further away from my friends, who aimiably discuss their own ups and downs, because I feel that their depression does not seem to match mine. Some of my friends who claim to be depressed don't ever even seem depressed to me. They talk about their mood fluctuations and their lows and it just sounds to me like their having bad days. I am alone. Maybe I have made it that way, but it's only because I feel as if no one understands. Maybe I'm being dramatic.

But nothing seems to help me and I don't even know why I'm still fighting to get better. It seems like "better" does not exist for me.

Replies:

Angus_A >> 15/09/2012 8:18am

i choose not to take medication for my depression, instead i fill my void with hobbies such as music, maybe you should do the same?

js81476 >> 09/09/2012 3:31pm

Maybe you would want to try seeing a clinical psychologist as opposed to a counselor, unless you were seeing a clinical psychologist. Try changing therapists in that case. Keep changing therapists until you find the right one but give each therapist a good shot.
You may be able to get help from WINZ to help pay for the cost of therapy.
I advise you to get into a psychiatric outpatient unit, if you haven't done so already. There you will see a psychiatrist you will have a more in depth knowledge of psychiatric medications and maybe try putting you on different medications.
I don't see a problem not talking about mental health issues to friends. You may be a private person and there's nothing wrong with that. See a psychologist or good counselor to talk about emotional issues.
Never give up hope that things will improve.

How do we help our children

Last post by lauramatiu 8 months ago

lauramatiu >> 11/09/2012 1:49pm

How do we help our young children? Can we use the same basic guidelines to recognise depressive symptoms in young children or do they need more specialised help?

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