I feel like I've been in mental health services too long
1 ReplyLast post by nobodyelse 24 hours ago
nobodyelse >> 04/03/2015 9:03pm
I was first referred to youth mental health services when I was 13. I was discharged after maybe a year or so, then referred again a few months later. I'm 17 now. I lived in supported accomodation for youth with mental health issues for just over a year and im moving back home now. I see a psychologist once a week I've been doing dbt for a couple of years now. I'm not on medication but I've tried a few, doesn't seem to help. I feel selfish, like im wasting time. I can't ask my family for support, and I can't really go to my friends because it's not fair to put them in difficult positions. I feel like I should be able to deal with this by now and like a lot of people are expecting me to, but I still feel so depressed, and struggle all the time. what are people's thoughts on this?
not too sure if im depressed or just being a dramaqueen
2 RepliesLast post by free_falling2902 1 day ago
Mysztry >> 27/02/2015 10:27pm
free_falling2902 >> 04/03/2015 2:57pm
Whether your depressed or just over-reacting make sure you talk to someone about it! Letting someone know about how you feel and what's going on can change your mood drastically, I know from experince. Depression is something you don't have to suffer through alone! Joining this website gave me hope and happiness and gave me the realisation that I'm not alone. No matter what, we'll be there for you every step of the way! :) Stay strong xx
I don't know what to do...
2 RepliesLast post by free_falling2902 7 days ago
An_Anonymiss >> 26/01/2015 2:06pm
My name is CJ, I am a girl, and I am almost 15 years old. I don't know how long I've had depression, but I'm pretty sure it's been so long people assumed that the symptoms i've been having are actually my personality traits. I got suspicious that I was coming down with depression when one of my friends (jokingly) made a comment about it: "You used to be so nice, what happened?"
I talk to my other friend about it, but I never feel like I can tell anyone face-to-face about everything, especially since I've just come to realization a few months ago...
I've subconsciously distanced myself from everyone over the years to the point where I feel like I can't trust anyone with the fear that they will tell others. I feel completely alone.
I had a breakdown one night and I had to miss school because of it; my mom says I should get a therapist, but that's the last thing I want. She, along with everyone else in my family, are included in the list of people I can't bring myself to trust.
I WANT to talk to somebody, but I always talk myself out of it every time I think I want to.
I don't know what to do...
free_falling2902 >> 27/02/2015 8:54am
Everyone feels like they have no one to talk to, no one to listen. But I'm here for you and so are everyone else on this site is here for you too. A therapist doesn't always help so what your saying is good. I understand that you don't trust your family because neither do I, and that's what happens when you feel this way. DOn't feel like giving up. Don't hurt yourself. If you ever need help, I'm here and so is everyone else :) Be strong xx
1 ReplyLast post by MRK 12 days ago
MRK >> 22/02/2015 12:27am
I feel pretty lost, confused, and overwhelmed. Feel like I can't cope with the everyday stresses other people do. I want to withdraw but I don't... I open up - friends family but I feel like I'm a drain on them, or they don't seem to understand, or they say the wrong things (which I try not to blame them for, but I guess I do) I feel like they're judging me and I wish I'd never said anything - and then I feel even more isolated and alone. What do I do?
Need some Tips...
2 RepliesLast post by MRK 12 days ago
Jacob_Reid14 >> 17/02/2015 9:04pm
I'm Jacob and I'm 14 years old, I have been depressed for 5 ish months now and I'm hiding it... But it's gotten a bit worse in the last few weeks. I want to get help but I don't want anybody to fell bad for me. (telling parents, friends ect.) that's why I've made an account on here :) so uhh if any body has any tips, please let me know. P.s I might not read this for a few days so if anybody replies quickly.. Thank you for helping me .
MRK >> 22/02/2015 12:19am
Hi Jacob. Even if you're not ready to talk to friends/family yet, I'm glad you're talking to us.
friendly advice needed (:
2 RepliesLast post by Duncan 24 days ago
bedazzled >> 05/01/2015 7:08pm
Hello to all you lovely helpful people out there! Some advice on how to cope with depression/anxiety would be so greatly appreciated.
This overwhelming feeling of being extremely drained, down and lonely (even when around people) has been happening for a few months now, and i'm not quite sure how to cope. it's like these negative thoughts control every situation im in to the point where socializing becomes a huge effort rather than a natural habit. I've never felt something so overpowering, like there is a constant judgemental news feed in my mind exploiting all my fears, flaws and insecurities that i cant concentrate on anything else.
whats worse is that the people i've tried to reach out to dont know how it feels, telling me to just cheer up and think positive which is easier said than done.
Ive been through a lot of stress over the last 3 years (moving around, stressful relationships, studying whilst working an intense waitress job) I didnt realize how much of a problem it had become until i realized i'd pushed away all my friends and family because of how distant and anti social my personality had become. im a 20 year old female with a loving caring family who lives in one of the most beautiful countries in the world I should be happy and cheerful but these thoughts have become my personality! I finally told my boyfriend id been experiencing extreme anxiety the other day because he asked why i'd been so weird and quiet. he didnt quite no how to react and just said to cheer up and see a doctor. I cant confide in anyone and it scares me so much because i dont know how to control it. Would any of you amazing people out there have some advice on how you dealt with your own similar experiences? peace, love & infinite wisdom be with you always (:
Duncan >> 09/02/2015 1:35pm
Hi bedazzled, I hear you I have experienced similar things (and still do to a degree). I know the judgemental feed, I would have things where in my mind my friends would judge me for something i have/haven't done, even though in reality they wouldn't. But these thoughts would feedback on my mind and affect the way I feel - it's not the thoughts that are the issue, it's the judgement.
I was in a stage where I wanted to be happy all the time but at times I was forcing myself to be happy. It felt like quicksand, the harder I fought to be positive, the more I would sink. Then it crossed my mind that if there was a sad moment I would want to feel sad, I would want to be open to what I was feeling and just let it in.
Shunyru Suzuki likens the mind to a cow in a pasture - if the field is small, the cow gets agitated, becoming unsettled and breaking the fence. But if the cow has a large pasture to roam in it is a lot more settled (I read this from a Phil Jackson book - he has an interview with Oprah Winfrey some segments of it are on Youtube). Part of when I feel agitated is when I try to control my mindset (and that's when the judgement comes regularly too because it's judging if your mindset is good or bad). When I'm willing to let the situation be, I'm more open and consequently feel better, and know that in letting the situation be, that is strength.
The personality you want to show will shine through once the clouds have drifted by. You have courage talking about your situation.
Lessons from anxiety
3 RepliesLast post by Duncan 25 days ago
Duncan >> 02/02/2015 3:50pm
Here are a few things I learned from my anxiety I have experienced over the last year or so if it helps anyone:
Acceptance helps. As Rogers says, the more we accept our limitations and challenges, the more change is stirred up.
Connection helps. You are a good person deep down, it's just hard to see when you are facing your challenges that depression/anxiety can face. Connection with other people helps that you are not defined by your anxiety. This can include the strength to give out to others.
It is a process to get to the great quality of life you are after and can happen in stages. You learn one thing that makes you feel great and you think you have it sussed. Then a couple of days later that direction faces adversity and the more adversity this direction faces, you learn the next step to a better life. This cycle carries on for people of all mental helth states I think. Willingness to learn is key, I found mindfulness helped with this. For example, I got to a stage where I thought, "If I'm relaxed I'm good". Then you realise that some moments don't call for us to be totally relaxed, and through this I learnt it's about being open to the experience.
Allow room for anxiety/stress. It hits us more when we think we can't afford to experience it, when we leave room for it we become more welcoming to it (and paradoxically are more relaxed) about the experience. Similarly, we want to be happy and relaxed, but we don't need to force happiness or relaxation on ourselves out of necessity; once we allow room for adverse things to happen, that creates the conditions for being open and relaxed.
Any anxious thoughts/topics only became an issue when I thought about them. When I realised this I changed my view from protecting the problem the thought was telling me, to dealing with the thought itself, letting the thought in and carrying on, or use it as a catalyst for picking up my energy if the thought was dragging me down.
Take away judgement. I would always be seeing things as good or bad for me, but through time I learned that if I have a good attitude everything is good for me, including anything I'm thinking about, feeling or doing.
Love your body. I have inflamed cartilage in my ribs and back but I learned to love my body just like you would love your child regardless of any imperfections.
Love the challenge. Adversity is a gift; it makes us human but brings out the best in humanity.
A good attitude to what the future holds - once you have a great attitude towards the future you are no longer fighting it, and arte able to experience the freedom to do whatever you want in this life, which I think is the goal we're really after.
The good moment is always there, just like the sun is (even if it's behind the clouds). We don't need to work to get the good moment - it's right there. ïf you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it"- pure imagination (from willy wonka and the chocolate factory)
Best of luck to everyone - lots of love.
Daphne_Ocean >> 06/02/2015 6:05pm
Nicely said, but it's quite hard to do all that when all you want to do is to grow wings and fly away.
Duncan >> 08/02/2015 11:07pm
Hi Daphne_Ocean, thanks for replying. These learnings I had were things I learnt when something didn't feel good - as I say the good moment is always there, it's just these are the things I learnt when something was in the way of the good moment. You are already enough, you deserve your good moment, you have the wings to fly to your happy place. It's just there's something preventing the wings from spreading. What it is could relate to one of the lessons I learnt, or it could be something else. The next time you're not feeling the greatest find out what it is that is getting in the way, and what you can do to let those wings spread. Lots of love
I have been sufferring from depression for more than 5 months
3 RepliesLast post by Blair 27 days ago
Blair >> 16/01/2015 12:55am
My name is Blair and i am a 15 year old male. I have not long created my account on this website but i have been sufffering from depression for more than 5 months now and he first thing i did on this website was the self-test and it told me that i am severely depressed.
I have always been feeling down. I also have the feeling that no one likes me and that i don't have any friends and that makes me feel always lonely.
I am currently going to a youth speciality service which i have ben referred to by my GP.
The main reason why i created an account on here is to see what other people suggest that i do and maybe (just maybe) suggest things to others.
I would really like to hear what you all have to say.
Emzy_Rose >> 22/01/2015 6:18pm
Talk to to somebody.. anybody! You have to let somebody help you and I know thats a lot easier said than done and I know it may be hard but thats the only way to feel better. Its worth trying, please.
Blair >> 06/02/2015 11:14pm
I am currently going to Youth Speciality Services in Christchurch and they have put me through to Stepping Stone trust so i believe i am in the right hands at the moment.
Am I depressed>
2 RepliesLast post by theatrerainbow 1 month ago
skins9653 >> 07/01/2015 7:08pm
Ive read through all the information but im still not sure if what i'm feeling is depression... help?
theatrerainbow >> 30/01/2015 2:22pm
What it basically comes down to is... have you felt low for a long time? (more than a couple weeks, or even just a couple weeks if it's very bad.) THEN GET HELP. If it's very mild, you can help yourself with techniques listed on this website. Mild, you can call helplines or maybe a GP. You should seek out professional help from moderate onwards. (if it's not too bad, you can start with your GP) Hope I helped! (kia kaha)
1 ReplyLast post by Emzy_Rose 1 month ago
Emzy_Rose >> 22/01/2015 6:28pm
Please, please, please you need to remember that people out there care. You need to remember that your life is worth living. No matter what people say to you and how much people put you down you cant let them win! You need to prove that your strong enough to hold on and fight through your depression. You may think that nobody cares and that nobody will miss you but you could never be more wrong. You may be going trough hell at the moment but its not always going to be like that. Your storm is going to end and you will smile again like you used to. You just ave to keep holding on. You have to be a fighter. You were born for a reason, not so you could just end your life when things got hard. I know how it feels to be trapped. I know how it feels to feel like nothing in this life is worth the pain. I know.. But let me tell you something. Your life i worth it. YOU are worth it. So please, please, pleasejust do one thing for me... Stop hating yourself! Talk to somebody, talk to me. I may not know you but I care. I promise.